So, all of you old people out there will understand what I say when I say I'm a Scarlett. It's from Scarlett O'Hara in Gone With The Wind. She would always say, "I won't think about that now, I'll think about it tomorrow." That is the way that she always dealt with things. I have always been a Scarlett (I take after my Pa). If something is distressing or difficult to think about or makes me sad or unhappy, I am usually pretty good about putting it out of my mind. I do that with a lot of things. I just don't dwell on or think about difficult things. It is my way of coping.
So, today Lacey called and said that Shan had posted a bunch of pictures of their trip to Florida, and some really cute videos of Jacey petting goats. And just talking to Lacey about the cute videos made me get a lump in my throat. I am just fine if I don't think about it, but watching Jacey on videos reminds me of how much I miss him. And seeing him doing really cute things in videos is bittersweet. I am so happy that we live in a time when we have all of these wonderful technological things available to us, but also sad that we have to live so far apart and miss the little day to day growing that babies do. I am afraid that Jacey will forget me. I miss seeing himself everyday and all of the funny little things he did. He is such a character! So, I did go home and look at all of the pictures and watch the darling videos and my heart ached but I am grateful that Jacey has such wonderful parents who love him and appreciate his special spirit. I am also grateful that I have two other wonderful little grandsons who are right here for me to enjoy, and a bonus granddaughter who is sweet and loving.
The Big Randy and I both got new callings in church this evening. I was asked to be the Relief Society secretary and Randy was asked to be the Young Men's secretary. I am proud of Randy because he has always said that one calling that he wouldn't ever want would be to serve in Young Men's. So, I was almost sure that he would say no thanks when they asked him, but he didn't! So, things will be picking up a bit for both of us in regard to church, but that's just as well. We've kind of been slackers for awhile and drifting and really need to get more involved with our ward again.
Hmm, what else? I made the Big Randoon cherry cheesecake for his birthday tomorrow. Yum!
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
I did it! I did it! I did it!
Woo hoo for me! I stepped on the scale this morning and sleepily looked down at the number and had to blink a couple of times because, low and behold, I FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY reached my goal weight of 135, after having plateaued around 137 and 136 for over 2 months!!! ARGGGGHHH! 44 pounds in just under 10 long months! And it was kind of anti-climactic, really, because I said a quiet little woo-hoo to myself in my lonely empty house, and then wondered if it was like that saying, something about if someone makes a sound and no one hears it, was there really a sound, or a tree falling, or something about a forest, I don't know. There is some kind of weird saying like that. But, I've lost my diet buddies and it was kind of sad - I called Randy and he was appropriately proud of me, and then I tried to call Shanny, my great diet buddy and she was traveling and probably packed her cell phone away, so I quietly went off to work. Then this evening the Big Randy and I went to Carl's for my celebratory Chocolate malt milkshake - yummy! And I drank the whole thing, which was about 1/4 too much because by the time I was done with it I was thinking why why WHY didn't I just stop about two or three minutes earlier when I was satisfied and happy instead of sucking away until I wanted to puke! But, it was good, although never quite as good as you think it's going to be, that's for sure!! Anyway, the hard part starts now - I have to figure how how to watch my calories in such a way that I don't lose weight or gain weight. That will be eeeenteresting, that's for sure!
Well, I got my couch, loveseat and chair delivered this afternoon. It is so funny to me how your mind plays tricks on you. In my mind I had completely changed the color of the couches into a sort of medium blue spruce green color. Well, all I can say is that I'm glad that I didn't buy the material for the valances yet! Ohmygosh I was so off! When the delivery guys brought in the couches I actually thought they were brown at first. They are a deep brownish greenish somethingish color that is really nice, but it was a shock to me at first because it was so different from what I remembered! And the putrid motel pillows that I was telling everyone about that in my mind had turned into a weird print of silver, white, turquoise and burgundy, were completely different and I really like them!!! They have some sort of brass colored metallic threads in them that make them awesome, and the burgundy color in them is actually not burgundy, it's a rust color that perfectly matches my paprika colored throw!!
But, that's all I'm saying about that and I'm NOT posting any pictures right now. I still have much to do, including finishing painting the beadboard and trim, painting the doors, making the valances, hanging pictures, buying an area rug and a few throw rugs to disguise the putrid blue carpeting, etc, etc. It will be awesome when I'm done and then I will dazzle all of you with the big REVEAL!!! :-D Yeah, it should be about time for another family dinner about then!
Hmm, what else. I visited Lacey today and the little nubbies - they are just so awesome! Jordan is turning into such a little boy! He was running round and round the couch yelling "Go! Go! Go!" and little Jayden is just so mellow, he was standing next to me on the couch while I fed him ice chips. He is so funny, he is so contemplative. He will smile for you but you have to work at it (you know, like bonking your head with a plastic dump truck, which I have been known to do). But, he has taken a liking to me and it is great since Jordan is a Papa's boy!! I sure do miss my Jacemeister though. I was just thinking about him today and how he used to let me rub his back and cuddle with him. It makes me want to cry sometimes I miss him so much!! But, I am happy to see him again in May! Woo hoo!
Hmm, what else. The Big Randy will be 52 on Friday! Yowza!! I don't even know what to say about that except YOWZA!!! :-D
Okay, so I'm done.
Well, I got my couch, loveseat and chair delivered this afternoon. It is so funny to me how your mind plays tricks on you. In my mind I had completely changed the color of the couches into a sort of medium blue spruce green color. Well, all I can say is that I'm glad that I didn't buy the material for the valances yet! Ohmygosh I was so off! When the delivery guys brought in the couches I actually thought they were brown at first. They are a deep brownish greenish somethingish color that is really nice, but it was a shock to me at first because it was so different from what I remembered! And the putrid motel pillows that I was telling everyone about that in my mind had turned into a weird print of silver, white, turquoise and burgundy, were completely different and I really like them!!! They have some sort of brass colored metallic threads in them that make them awesome, and the burgundy color in them is actually not burgundy, it's a rust color that perfectly matches my paprika colored throw!!
But, that's all I'm saying about that and I'm NOT posting any pictures right now. I still have much to do, including finishing painting the beadboard and trim, painting the doors, making the valances, hanging pictures, buying an area rug and a few throw rugs to disguise the putrid blue carpeting, etc, etc. It will be awesome when I'm done and then I will dazzle all of you with the big REVEAL!!! :-D Yeah, it should be about time for another family dinner about then!
Hmm, what else. I visited Lacey today and the little nubbies - they are just so awesome! Jordan is turning into such a little boy! He was running round and round the couch yelling "Go! Go! Go!" and little Jayden is just so mellow, he was standing next to me on the couch while I fed him ice chips. He is so funny, he is so contemplative. He will smile for you but you have to work at it (you know, like bonking your head with a plastic dump truck, which I have been known to do). But, he has taken a liking to me and it is great since Jordan is a Papa's boy!! I sure do miss my Jacemeister though. I was just thinking about him today and how he used to let me rub his back and cuddle with him. It makes me want to cry sometimes I miss him so much!! But, I am happy to see him again in May! Woo hoo!
Hmm, what else. The Big Randy will be 52 on Friday! Yowza!! I don't even know what to say about that except YOWZA!!! :-D
Okay, so I'm done.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
I love Craig's List!!
Okay, so I wanted to show off all of my treasures that I have collected so far!
First, this is my cool floor lamp that I got from Wal-mart for $25.00!! (Thanks for letting me copy you Shan!!
Next is the cute little fluted ceramic thingie that I just liked and picked up for $11.99 at Tuesday Morning
Next is the AWESOME picture that I found yesterday at Michael's. I was so happy about this. It was a print that I got for $29.99, and I couldn't find a frame that would fit it, so I asked the guy at the counter how much it would cost to get it professionally framed by Michael's, in something simple WITHOUT a mat, and he said the starting price would be at least $150.00, so I was looking at probably around $200.00 to get the picture framed. But I loved it so much that I kept looking at the ready made frames trying to find something that might work, and I finally found an off the shelf frame, but I would have to trim the sides of the picture 1 inch on each side, so I stood there in Michael's for probably an hour trying to decide if I did that if the picture would still look good, and then trying to decide which frame I wanted! But, I eventually got up the courage and got the frame, and trimmed the print, and it is an awesome picture, captures all of the colors that I wanted and it is substantial and I love it! So, anyway, the total cost for the print and the over-the-counter frame that I got for 40% off was about $60.00!! Woo hoo!
Next is a picture of a cool wrought-iron thingie that I fell in love with at Big Lots. I still have more to do with the mantle, of course, but it will be the centerpiece. Anyway, I was looking at something kind of like it at Tuesday Morning, but it was something like $54.00, and I got this for $20.00!!! Also, is a picture of a wrought-iron sconce thingie - I got two for $5.00 each at Big Lots!
So, next, here's a picture of three things that I love! The first is a really cool lampshade that my mom gave me that I have always liked!! FOR FREE! I just need to buy a table lamp. Then there's the beautiful sofa table that my dad made that I have always coveted, and my dad gave that to me FOR FREE! And lastly is a paprika colored throw that I picked up at target clearance priced for $9.99. That is my paprika "pop" as I like to call it!!
So, now, you're probably wondering why I love Craig's list! I hit the mother-lode this evening! I picked up a new (used) armoire for the t.v. that I just love for $100.00!!! AND a John Elway signature collection Bassett coffee table with a lift-up section for eating, and a drawer and everything else - it probably was around $600 or $700.00 new and is extremely heavy hard wood, and we got it for $135.00!! So, an armoir and a coffee table for $235.00!! Can't beat that, huh! I love Craig's List!! :-)
Next is a picture of a cool wrought-iron thingie that I fell in love with at Big Lots. I still have more to do with the mantle, of course, but it will be the centerpiece. Anyway, I was looking at something kind of like it at Tuesday Morning, but it was something like $54.00, and I got this for $20.00!!! Also, is a picture of a wrought-iron sconce thingie - I got two for $5.00 each at Big Lots!
So, next, here's a picture of three things that I love! The first is a really cool lampshade that my mom gave me that I have always liked!! FOR FREE! I just need to buy a table lamp. Then there's the beautiful sofa table that my dad made that I have always coveted, and my dad gave that to me FOR FREE! And lastly is a paprika colored throw that I picked up at target clearance priced for $9.99. That is my paprika "pop" as I like to call it!!
So, now, you're probably wondering why I love Craig's list! I hit the mother-lode this evening! I picked up a new (used) armoire for the t.v. that I just love for $100.00!!! AND a John Elway signature collection Bassett coffee table with a lift-up section for eating, and a drawer and everything else - it probably was around $600 or $700.00 new and is extremely heavy hard wood, and we got it for $135.00!! So, an armoir and a coffee table for $235.00!! Can't beat that, huh! I love Craig's List!! :-)
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Just to get Shanny off my back!
Well, I have nothing interesting to say but Shannon shamed me into writing another post. My life is pretty uninteresting right now! But, I am working on the family room so that has been kind of fun! I am trying REALLY HARD to enjoy the journey - taking my time and trying not to get stressed about the mess downstairs. The Big Randy finished the beadboard and trim in the family room and hallway, so now I get to do all of the painting, because Randy is not allowed to paint. Ohmygosh, the one time I let him help me paint a bedroom was a complete disaster! He was slopping paint all over the baseboard molding and then he slipped and hurt his toe really bad. Because Randy is NOT a "relax and enjoy the journey" kind of guy! He wants to get in there and gitter done! He does not enjoy the doing, he enjoys the being done! But, I am happy that I have a hubby that knows how to do these kinds of things - it is really great.
So, after agonizing many days over a paint color, and having six different color samples on my wall, I decided on a medium taupe color - it makes the family room warm and cozy looking and really makes the beadboard POP. I keep trying to completely disregard the putrid blue carpeting and am hoping that a few strategically placed rugs will at least make it bearable until we get new carpeting. I'd like to finish up decorating the family room, and then do the laundry area and the bathroom, and then after that I'd like to get carpeting for the downstairs and then move on upstairs and start either on the upstairs bathroom or the kitchen.
So, that is my life right now. I'm a little sad today because I was telling Randy that I just realized that we have no visits from kids to look forward to for I don't know how long! Josh is back in Germany and leaving for Iraq soon, Chelsea and Jeff have some incredible expenses coming up so if I want to see them, I think we're going to have to go down there!! Shantommy were just here for six months and it was great. So, it will be kind of a quiet year for us, but we can get some stuff done and enjoy Jordan and Jayden and Tabitha at least. We are sure looking forward to Pensacola in May though - woo hoo!!
So, I'm also sad for Chels and Jeff. Man, life is sure tough sometimes. I wish I had all of the answers for them, but I just don't. Who knows why people are given the challenges that they are given. I don't know why but I don't think we're really supposed to know why. I think it's all a matter of what we do with the challenges we are given. Do we "curse God and die" or do we rise above the challenges we face and become better people for it. Of course, it's a lot easier said than done, that's for sure, and I don't feel like I have a lot of experience in that department in that I've been incredibly blessed my whole life. But, life is a challenge and we all have them, in one way or another. I am so proud of my mom and dad for facing the challenge of dad's health issues and trying to stay positive and happy. I know it's not easy and I know that sometimes they aren't feeling positive and happy but they try to put on a brave front for their kids. I just hope they know that all of their children would do anything for them and help them in any way that we can. We're (I'm) just kind of a doofus sometimes and don't really know what to do to help and I'm afraid I'm not the most thoughtful person in the world. But, my heart and my intentions are good, I guess!
Hmm, what else. Wow, I sure manage to write a lot even when I have nothing to say! There, Shan, are you happy now? XXOO
So, after agonizing many days over a paint color, and having six different color samples on my wall, I decided on a medium taupe color - it makes the family room warm and cozy looking and really makes the beadboard POP. I keep trying to completely disregard the putrid blue carpeting and am hoping that a few strategically placed rugs will at least make it bearable until we get new carpeting. I'd like to finish up decorating the family room, and then do the laundry area and the bathroom, and then after that I'd like to get carpeting for the downstairs and then move on upstairs and start either on the upstairs bathroom or the kitchen.
So, that is my life right now. I'm a little sad today because I was telling Randy that I just realized that we have no visits from kids to look forward to for I don't know how long! Josh is back in Germany and leaving for Iraq soon, Chelsea and Jeff have some incredible expenses coming up so if I want to see them, I think we're going to have to go down there!! Shantommy were just here for six months and it was great. So, it will be kind of a quiet year for us, but we can get some stuff done and enjoy Jordan and Jayden and Tabitha at least. We are sure looking forward to Pensacola in May though - woo hoo!!
So, I'm also sad for Chels and Jeff. Man, life is sure tough sometimes. I wish I had all of the answers for them, but I just don't. Who knows why people are given the challenges that they are given. I don't know why but I don't think we're really supposed to know why. I think it's all a matter of what we do with the challenges we are given. Do we "curse God and die" or do we rise above the challenges we face and become better people for it. Of course, it's a lot easier said than done, that's for sure, and I don't feel like I have a lot of experience in that department in that I've been incredibly blessed my whole life. But, life is a challenge and we all have them, in one way or another. I am so proud of my mom and dad for facing the challenge of dad's health issues and trying to stay positive and happy. I know it's not easy and I know that sometimes they aren't feeling positive and happy but they try to put on a brave front for their kids. I just hope they know that all of their children would do anything for them and help them in any way that we can. We're (I'm) just kind of a doofus sometimes and don't really know what to do to help and I'm afraid I'm not the most thoughtful person in the world. But, my heart and my intentions are good, I guess!
Hmm, what else. Wow, I sure manage to write a lot even when I have nothing to say! There, Shan, are you happy now? XXOO
Monday, February 18, 2008
Getting my feet wet!
Well, I decided to jump on the bandwagon and start my own blog too. Although, anyone who knows me knows that I don't like conflict or "spirited debate" so I will have to work on getting my courage up to actually express any real feelings or opinions!! :-D I do love reading everyone else's blogs, though, so I thought WHAT THE HECK!!!
Hmm, what is the latest with me . . . I've been obsessing. I'm afraid I have fallen off the bandwagon and haved stated watching HGTV again - both the HD and the non-HD channels, so I'm getting double shots! I stay up late every night searching the internet for the "perfect" livingroom that I can copy and spend hours and hours stewing and fretting over every design decision that I make for my stupid family room! Sometimes I think it might be best to go ahead and sell the house and start out fresh and new rather than trying to redo stuff. We are not "redoers." We don't have the kind of budget that allows for large scale remodeling projects - the best we can do is small redecorating makeovers! You may be thinking, what's the deal with that, they both work full time, they should be able to afford to fix up their house. And that is true, but we have chosen to donate a large percentage of our "discretionary funds" to our church, and we are happy to do so, but it does limit what we can do with the rest. Both the Big Randy and I like to take vacations and visit our kiddies, so we have to cut corners somewhere and get "creative" when it comes to fixing things up at home! But, it's fun and I have always been kind of cheap so I don't mind scouring Craig's list, Wal-mart, and other budget-friendly sources for the perfect find!
I call my blog "Recovering Empty Nester" because that is how I would describe myself. I joke to people that I have been grieving for my lost children for the last 10 years. I'm not talking about my grown children, because they are all great kids and I talk to them all the time and see them often. I'm talking about my "young family" - that "Camelot" time when they were all home and we were together as a family. That is what I grieve for. It was all I ever wanted and I never wanted it to end! I wasn't prepared for it when it did end and I grieved the loss for many years. But now that emptiness has been replaced by four beautiful grandchildren who fill in the empty places in my heart and make me happy again! Is there anything more wonderful than the laughter of little children - I don't think so! :-)
This is a really odd time of life. I am 50 - WOW, it is still a surprise to me. I remember feeling like I wouldn't live to be 21 because that seemed so old. Now I look in the mirror and am almost panic-stricken when I find a new wrinkle, which I did just yesterday. A huge crevasse on my face that I would swear just appeared overnight. I named it Gertrude. And I may have just lost a bunch of weight, but unfortunately underneath all that fat was still a 50 year old woman. I won't go into details, but suffice it to say, it's not pretty! :-) But, what can you do! I bought a web cam so I could talk to little Jacey once in awhile, and I can't stand to look at myself looking down into the camera! And it's not just looks, I am feeling older too. I spent yesterday cleaning the house, detailing my car, working on the family room redo, and by the time I went to bed, everything hurt and I was walking around all bent over like an 80 year old! I don't understand where the time went! I'm sure that Pa feels the same way realizing that he is about to turn 70!! My dad, 70 years old - I can't believe it! There is a scripture in the Book of Mormon where Nephi, I believe, talks about life and says something about "our lives passed away as it were in a dream" - it's so true. It seems like it was yesterday that I was 21, yesterday that my babies were small, just yesterday that Randy and I were dating. I tell my girls all of the time to treasure every moment with their little ones and not to wish their lives away, but to appreciate the season of life that they are living in. I don't know if I necessarily appreciate being 50, but I'm sure that when I'm 70, 50 will sound pretty good, huh Pa! :-) So, I guess I better follow my own advice!
I will be traveling to Boise next month for 4 days of municipal clerk training. If you didn't know, I am being groomed to take the place of my boss, the Municipal Services Director/City Clerk, when she retires in about 5 years. I am working on getting a CMC designation (Certified Municipal Clerk). Yep, that's right Carla! I will have initials after my name! :-) But, it's funny, it's not an honor that I was seeking at all. I have never been a career woman. I love my job and try to do well, but I am not ambitious at all and am perfectly content where I am. So, it is with a little fear and trepidation that I am moving forward and finally working on my career.
Well, that's about it for me. When I can think of something interesting, I'll write again! :-)
Hmm, what is the latest with me . . . I've been obsessing. I'm afraid I have fallen off the bandwagon and haved stated watching HGTV again - both the HD and the non-HD channels, so I'm getting double shots! I stay up late every night searching the internet for the "perfect" livingroom that I can copy and spend hours and hours stewing and fretting over every design decision that I make for my stupid family room! Sometimes I think it might be best to go ahead and sell the house and start out fresh and new rather than trying to redo stuff. We are not "redoers." We don't have the kind of budget that allows for large scale remodeling projects - the best we can do is small redecorating makeovers! You may be thinking, what's the deal with that, they both work full time, they should be able to afford to fix up their house. And that is true, but we have chosen to donate a large percentage of our "discretionary funds" to our church, and we are happy to do so, but it does limit what we can do with the rest. Both the Big Randy and I like to take vacations and visit our kiddies, so we have to cut corners somewhere and get "creative" when it comes to fixing things up at home! But, it's fun and I have always been kind of cheap so I don't mind scouring Craig's list, Wal-mart, and other budget-friendly sources for the perfect find!
I call my blog "Recovering Empty Nester" because that is how I would describe myself. I joke to people that I have been grieving for my lost children for the last 10 years. I'm not talking about my grown children, because they are all great kids and I talk to them all the time and see them often. I'm talking about my "young family" - that "Camelot" time when they were all home and we were together as a family. That is what I grieve for. It was all I ever wanted and I never wanted it to end! I wasn't prepared for it when it did end and I grieved the loss for many years. But now that emptiness has been replaced by four beautiful grandchildren who fill in the empty places in my heart and make me happy again! Is there anything more wonderful than the laughter of little children - I don't think so! :-)
This is a really odd time of life. I am 50 - WOW, it is still a surprise to me. I remember feeling like I wouldn't live to be 21 because that seemed so old. Now I look in the mirror and am almost panic-stricken when I find a new wrinkle, which I did just yesterday. A huge crevasse on my face that I would swear just appeared overnight. I named it Gertrude. And I may have just lost a bunch of weight, but unfortunately underneath all that fat was still a 50 year old woman. I won't go into details, but suffice it to say, it's not pretty! :-) But, what can you do! I bought a web cam so I could talk to little Jacey once in awhile, and I can't stand to look at myself looking down into the camera! And it's not just looks, I am feeling older too. I spent yesterday cleaning the house, detailing my car, working on the family room redo, and by the time I went to bed, everything hurt and I was walking around all bent over like an 80 year old! I don't understand where the time went! I'm sure that Pa feels the same way realizing that he is about to turn 70!! My dad, 70 years old - I can't believe it! There is a scripture in the Book of Mormon where Nephi, I believe, talks about life and says something about "our lives passed away as it were in a dream" - it's so true. It seems like it was yesterday that I was 21, yesterday that my babies were small, just yesterday that Randy and I were dating. I tell my girls all of the time to treasure every moment with their little ones and not to wish their lives away, but to appreciate the season of life that they are living in. I don't know if I necessarily appreciate being 50, but I'm sure that when I'm 70, 50 will sound pretty good, huh Pa! :-) So, I guess I better follow my own advice!
I will be traveling to Boise next month for 4 days of municipal clerk training. If you didn't know, I am being groomed to take the place of my boss, the Municipal Services Director/City Clerk, when she retires in about 5 years. I am working on getting a CMC designation (Certified Municipal Clerk). Yep, that's right Carla! I will have initials after my name! :-) But, it's funny, it's not an honor that I was seeking at all. I have never been a career woman. I love my job and try to do well, but I am not ambitious at all and am perfectly content where I am. So, it is with a little fear and trepidation that I am moving forward and finally working on my career.
Well, that's about it for me. When I can think of something interesting, I'll write again! :-)
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